Just Another Wednesday Afternoon
By Alicia Bruzzone
How did they all have swords? Seriously, no one on freaking campus thought weapons might not be cool in enclosed spaces and called security? I was so not for expanding my mind if it entailed cutting my brain into smaller pieces and smearing it over the auditorium. Someone left that minor detail out of my orientation booklet.
Cam’s arm was steady as he stood with blade raised at my side, facing our new foes.
“What do you want?”
The woman in the middle grinned and swung her weapon down suddenly, nicking clean through the worn carpet. “A slice of your time.”
A fellow compatriot nodded his agreement, loosening his grip slightly on his sword as his attention swayed. Cam would have rapped me on the knuckles for that infraction. “We were pointedly told to ask a few sharp questions.” The others around his tittered in amusement, raising blades. “But we’re gonna deviate a little, right? Just a few cutting remarks.”
It was worse than I feared. They were a freaking pun patrol. “Do you plan to groan me to death with poor jokes?”
“Death is my forte.”
Another smile over broad lips as the woman picked at the snag she’d made in the carpet. “I’d like to take a stab at it.”
At this point I might let them get a hit on me to make it stop. They only thing they were making bleed was my ears. Screw this. I lunged forward, five pointed blades meeting my approach. Well, this wasn’t good.
“Just a question, there’s five of us, and only two of you, so how do you think this plays out?”
It felt like being stuck in one of those maths problems they give you in primary school. You know; John takes twenty dollars to the cafe. If his friend Jenny takes six dollars, and Kenneth takes twice as much, what does John have? I’d say he’s probably got hunger pains as he now only has six dollars for lunch, and deep seated psychological trust issues to boot since his friends keep stealing from him.
And I had five potential stab wounds. Well, three. Cam had followed, and they were split between us.
“Stop!” the woman yelled, lowering her sword. Her friends followed suit, grimacing in complaint. She begrudgingly looked in my eyes. “We need a favour.”
Way to freaking butter me up.
Before I could satisfactorily deny the request, someone else came to join our party. Security finally freaking decided to show up.
Of course, now I was the only one brandishing a weapon, and mine was covered in blood. No prizes for who was deemed the biggest threat. Stupid logic.
My chin smacked onto the floor as I was tackled by an ex-linebacker. I was given a warning not to move, but as I think two of my ribs were now broken, and there was no air in my lungs, there wasn’t exactly a lot I was up to.
Jostling me form the room, one of the others piped out. “Sorry to hole you up, but it is kind of important.”
No way I was going to struggle with the security guard. He was my escape plan from the pun centre, and it’s not like he could put me in prison or anything serious. There wasn’t a lock up anywhere on campus, I’d probably just be let out near the pond like the rouge ducks caught in classrooms. There’d even be water nearby to wash the blood off.
“Adeline, it’s about your sister.”
Cam caught my eye and nodded. Time to cut and run.
Freaking hell, it was contagious.