“Fuck you,” I muttered. Traffic was bad, the weather worse and my mood – surly. Cutting me off was not the best idea at that moment. I memorized the make and model of the car, and the license plate as well. If I ever came across that particular vehicle, I would fuck it the hell up.
The phone went off in the seat next to me. I glanced down at it. My boss. Again. She could wait. She was a douche-and-a-half, and I was only going to be ten minutes late. Maybe twenty. But still. I was only late a couple of times a week. She could bite me.
I moved a bit closer to the bumper of the car that had cut me off. I’d been in line for the exit for ten minutes, who’d he think he was, trying to jump in like that? That wasn’t merging, that was just bad manners. Still, I wasn’t about to let it happen twice.
Text chimed. It was my ex. I grabbed it, shooting off a quick text. No I win’t take the kids on Fri nite. Don’t car abt ur wrk. I hav pland.
Looked up just in time to keep myself from ramming the bumper. Fucker would’a deserved it, anyway.
Where the hell were all these people going, anyway? Idiots. They should only let people who pass an intelligence test get a driver’s license. Any fucker can have a snot-nosed brat or drive a car, but you get caught with a j and you’re busted. I mean, what the hell?
Damn phone. Ex again. I want to just kick back, light up, crack a beer and throw down in WoW. I don’t give a rat’s pimply ass that she has to fuckin’ work. She shoulda thought of that before she up and left me. She’s not gonna get anyone better’n me, and…
“FUCK!” My middle finger shot up reflexively as I accelerated, closing the gap between me and the first idiot. That was a big NOPE. Sorry, old-ass-Ford-Ranger-from-Texas, better luck next time, maybe the sucker behind me will let you in.
Doubt it, but still.
NO. I can’t take the kids. Plasn.
It wasn’t like I had three little angels. They were always whining and crying and getting into shit and not listening. Every other weekend is fine.
“What the hell are you doing, dickweed?” I yelled – like he could hear me. That pickup just wouldn’t quit. The passenger was some skinny little kid, trying to use pleading eyes, but that wasn’t gonna work. Shoulda gotten in line with the rest of us. Even their dog looked like it was pleading with me, his stupid brown shaggy head sticking up over the side of the pickup’s bed.
What kind of idiot puts their dog in the back of a pickup, anyway? They don’t deserve to be let in, let ‘em wait. Screw the kid and his crying.
Holy fucking shit. How many times was my boss gonna call?
“Yeah, what?” It took all of my effort to keep my eyes on the road and not let them permanently roll up into my head.
“What do you mean, ‘what’ – you’re late…again!” Stupid woman sounded like she was on the rag again. Course, when didn’t she, amirite? I gave myself a mental high-five for that one. “Listen, I know you’ve been going through a lot,” whatever, what the hell did she know, “but you have to stop coming in late and leaving early. You never even call to check in. I can’t keep covering for you! This is the last time, you got it?”
Yeah, I got it you b… ”Fine, whatever. I’ll be there in ten.”
“Ok, I’ll see you th…” I ended the call. Goddamn management, always riding my ass. All they did was sit in their office and do quizzes on Buzzfeed anyway. Who cares what the fuck type of water you would be, anyway?
I glanced over at the Ranger. They’d pulled up farther in the other lane. The dog was up on his hind legs, grinning like an idiot and tongue hanging full out. It was a mutt of some kind, a big and shaggy dog.
I missed Tucker.
Did that driver really think he was going to be able to nose in further up? In this traffic, with this cold, foggy drizzle, ain’t nothing he was going to be able to do until some shmuck stopped paying attention, or he’d have to get off ant the next exit – whihch was a long fuckin’ way off. Made me happy to think abou-
“OH SHIT!” The dog jumped. Right over the side. The pickup didn’t slow down, even though we were all honking like crazy. No one was stopping for the damned dog, wither, who was just kinda standing there, shit eating grin, looking at all the pretty lights. What the actual fuck?
Not my problem. Wasn’t about to be even later after that asshole boss reamed me out like that. I couldn’t… goddamnit, I couldn’t not stop. I put my emergency blinkers on and angled across the two lanes. Fuckers could honk at me all they wanted. I didn’t give a shit. I reached over, threw my passenger door open and Shaggy jumped the hell in my car, like it knew me.
Fuck. Now I was going to have to catch up to the pickup. And I’d be even later.
I sighed, and grabbed my phone. I was going to call in. Maybe I could leave earlier so I wouldn’t be so late.
And maybe I could take the kids after all. I could use a healer and a tank in our dungeon run.