Caught in a trance
Only When I Lose Myself
Paula M Carlson
The alarm pierces the silence. Jory’s hand creeps from the warmness of his 400-count cocoon. His hand trembles as he ceases its cry. The longer he remains in bed, the more thoughts course. He presses the pillow into his face, relaxes then throws it onto the floor.
Standing up is as much a chore as not falling down. Lightheadedness hits him almost as hard as the ground. Damn it. He struggles to his feet and wraps the comforter around his skin. He shuffles along the carpet until he reaches the thermostat. As he turns the knob a sigh of warm air rushes towards him.
On his way to the shower, Jory dials room service. His voice cracks, “Yeah, can I get some tea in 614, please? And a newspaper?” He drops his cloak behind him as he walks to the bathroom.
The fluorescent light blinds his weary, azure eyes. He steps into the shower. The heat reminds him of the club only hours before, packed with free spirits, lost souls, and those caught in between.
It looked like a mock orgy as everyone danced to the trance music. The bass pounded in his chest. He’d first seen her at the bar as he ordered a drink. She danced seductively with two men, neither less beautiful than her. He wondered what it would be like to be pressed up against her, only sheer layers of clothing separating their sweaty bodies. Her athletic body seemed caramelized as the sweat beaded on her tan skin. Her pixie hair tousled enough to excite anyone. Maybe it was her confidence. Maybe it was her ass in those jeans. In the early hours, she left alone. Jory finished his drink, and then two more, enough for him sleep.
He begins to hum and then sing a fitting song for him. For her. “Something beautiful is happening inside for me. Something sensual, it’s full of fire and mystery. I feel hypnotized, I feel paralyzed. I have found heaven.”
The expected knock startles Jory. The water drips off his skin as he quickly wraps the towel around his toned body. He brushes his hand through his ebony hair as he continues to sing, “It’s only when I lose myself in someone else, that I find myself.”